How Your Thoughts Affect Your Words

Recently I experienced my feelings getting hurt by a loved one. It's amazing how much my mind wanted to keep re-experiencing the conversation-- turning it over and over again. It's as if there were a part of me that enjoyed inflicting emotional pain on myself. In doing my best to be impeccable with my word and not gossiping, I need to remember this is all a mental game. We speak what we think. If there is poison in our thoughts, there is poison in our words. There's a reason for the saying "get your mind off of it". When I get my mind off the negative, I can go on and live and be happy.

I dealt with my situation by speaking my truth and now as I write this I am letting it go. Why would I choose to focus on the one negative conversation that I had with this person when so many, if not all, of my other interactions have been purely positive and wonderful? By retelling the story and staying on the negative, I reinforce bad feelings for the relationship and that just makes me feel bad. I think there is great wisdom in cutting people some slack, not blowing things up too much by talking about it and getting on to more fruitful mental ground.

Peace everyone.

Hot Topics and Hot Pockets

Hot Topics do to my mouth what Hot Pockets do to Jim Gaffigan's digestive tract. Hot Topics are topics that create such an emotional response for me that it is nearly impossible to not run at the mouth...in high volume. I'm trying to bring more consciousness as to what my Hot Topics are because if I know what they are then I can brace myself to be super present when they come up. Some Hot Topics for me: rude/mean people (that is, my interpretation of rude/mean people), politics, and recent emotional wounds.

As I try to understand my own Hot Topics, enjoy this video from Jim Gaffigan on Hot Pockets.

Jim Gaffigan - Beyond the Pale - Hot Pockets @ Yahoo! Video

Gossip Diet- Not Recommended for Weight Loss

I know I've beat the diet analogy to a bone, but this gossip fast is making me fat! I'm totally serious here-- I cannot stop eating chocolate. Could it be that my old ways of talking were actually somewhat medicinal and cathartic-- maybe even fun? Is letting go of expressing every little impulse driving me into a new addiction of sweet tasting endorphins? Or maybe this experience is making me feel like I have to stuff my words down- literally-with every carbohydrate in my cupboard.

When I started this whole thing a couple weeks ago, I envisioned my mouth as having a religious experience, almost like being born again. No longer would it be a cauldron of bad juju. Instead as I went through the day speaking only truth and love I would begin to transform, growing more and more beautiful with each passing sentence. As I cleansed my tongue of all this negativity, it would spill over into my eating habits too. I imagined it would only be a few weeks before I was eating only foods straight from the ground- created purely by mother earth. Not long thereafter, I would turn into the Princess I always dreamed I could be: 10 pounds lighter, 10 years younger and 10 times wealthier. Being impeccable with my word- my own Garden of Eden.

Could it maybe just possibly be, that my expectations are too high? I think I have to seriously consider that. Perhaps I've turned to chocolate because it gives me the temporary sense of bliss I have been counting on from this little experiment. Maybe it's time to drop the fairy tale. But I can't! Really it's the fairy tale that is keeping me going. Not the dream of castles and unicorns, but of a magical life surrounded by beauty. I know that my life is a magical life surrounded by beauty, but I'm still adjusting my focus. This word-thing is helping with all of that.

I'm sticking to the fairy tale. I guess that means I'll just have to endure the extra pounds for now. I'm holding out that what I gain from this whole thing, in the end, will be much greater than just weight.

Gossip Work Arounds

As I continue to work on stopping gossip, I am finding that my mind can be quite clever. It has discovered ways to cheat on my "gossip diet". (I know, it isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle). For instance, I tell a story about someone, but don't reveal their name. This way I feel like I am being noble in protecting their identity. Or I'll express how I am feeling about someone in the name of speaking my truth, but what I am sharing isn't really productive, necessary or kind. Technically, I am not gossiping. But if I am to move toward my goal of being IMPECCABLE (that is, using the word only in the direction of truth and love) then these work-arounds won't fly with my goal.

No doubt, ending the gossip is the big first step to being impeccable with my word. I really have improved on this tremendously. I still question the gray area - what is truthful and what is using the word as a sword? For instance, what about venting? It's supposed to be healthy, but how often do I say I'm venting as an excuse to release my frustration with someone and pollute someone else in the process? These are not easy questions to answer. Maybe someone out there has some insight. I guess it comes down to intent and also, doing my best. I'm not going to be a zealot, but I'm also not giving up.